What's wrong with Japanese men/Western women are plain ugly?

[lordkuz]

As a caucasian male - I find all males "unattractive"! He he.
I do believe that likes attract, in male / female relationships, including similar or same races. After initial physical attraction, other aspects of each individual comes into play, however, without the initial "sex appeal" , there is no chance of anything more to develop.
I used to find Japanese women of "no appeal" or attraction to me. (in a physical sense ] ..however, after spending a lot more time in Japan and absorbing japanese culture through film and the internet, I find myself rather attracted to the japanese race (female of course!)
Soooooooo - how about this theory - I understand , and have witnessed, that in Japan, women are the more adventurous in regard to travel - especially visiting other countries - perhaps with this exposure, they, just as I have experienced, are the ones to become involved in relationships outside their own race.?
I do agree with the male and female role theories too...however, thought Id put this one in - It's probably a load of hoo ha, and not really that important issue.....

Jaane.
Kuz

[Outkast]

Preferences can be weird. But I think what a lot of this simply boils down to is what people are accustomed to seeing. Although Japanese society definitely did not like it when it first started, it's a fact that White Male-Japanese Female couples have been happening since WW2. So even if some still look badly on it, there is a precedent for it, so it's not completely unbelievable anymore. White Female-Japanese Male couples, not so much. They're still rare in Japan, so people are not used to the idea.

Ultimately, this may change if these couples become more common, like the more "normal" type did before it. That's just my observation, anyway...

[osekihan]

Just a question:

Would a Japanese-American woman that has the language compentency of a semi-educated gaijin be on the "NO!" list for Japanese men as well?

[Belton]

Just a question:

Would a Japanese-American woman that has the language compentency of a semi-educated gaijin be on the "NO!" list for Japanese men as well?

Maybe.
I think ultimately it's a question of culture rather than looks.
I'd bet the American part of the cultural heritage could be stronger. (given that she has limited language ability, I think that's reasonable) She won't fit in.

Even Japanese returnees from overseas postings apparently get a hard time for picking up bad foreign habits.

It may not be just desire at work. I think there's also the "will she make a good wife, support me in my career" thing going on a lot of the time. What has been said to me about the importance of a partners family surprised me to say the least when I first heard it. And this is when Japanese marry each other.

In the end though it takes all sorts. If he/she is worth it they'll make the effort and see the person not just the racial or cultural backgrounds.

[Liz21]

No one has mentioned physical attributes of Western women that Japanese men may find attractive: white skin and larger breasts.

[Ulver_684]

There. Made ya look!

I hear and can read a lot about Japanese women dating Western men but, you know, I'm wondering why there aren't more Japanese men - Western women couples.

When I went to my Japanese class opening ceremonies, I counted a dozen inter-racial couples. Every one of them Japanese women/Western men.

So... what gives?

Is there a stigma that Western women have about Japanese men and that's why we don't see many of these couples or do Japanese men not find Western women particularly attractive physically or culturally?

I'm really curious.

Of course, I'm writing from outside Japan. But I have a feeling that on average, even in Japan there is still a big disparity between the make-up of Japanese/Western couples. Or am I completely off?

How can you say that Western girls are plain ugly! We are beautiful I'm a western girl and I'm not ugly and plain ok!

I have a proof, wanna see my picture?

[untmdsprt]

I guess using that as my basis of understanding, I'm trying to find any reason why a Western woman would want to date a Japanese guy, then (aside from looks and surface personality ).

My point of view is American men are a$$holes!! I've had nothing but bad experiences with them. I did have a date with a nice Japanese man, and we seem to have a lot in common. I love his personality, and don't care that he's not muscular. He's also 189cm tall, which is unusal for a Japanese man.

He has lived in the states for at least a year, and may be more open to an interracial relationship. But like any relationship, it has to do with each other's goals in life. It all depends if you can accept the other person. I'm willing to give the relationship a shot, and if nothing else at least I have another friend.

BTW, I'm adopted so any American could be related to me! Dating outside my race would possibly eliminate any chance of me dating my brother or cousin.

[Jason]

My point of view is American men are a$$holes!! I've had nothing but bad experiences with them.

I'm sorry you've had bad experiences, but you should know that we're not all jerks. It's just that the morons tend to be more vocal and outgoing so they're the ones you're more likely to meet.

[mumei]

this is something that worries me a little about trying to live in japan...
I have male friends who think that they can stay there by marrying a Japanese girl (and they are probably right) and also know Japanese girls that have married 'into' the UK as well...
I really want to live in Japan but every time I read these kind of discussions I think maybe I am just chasing a dream that is never going to be mine, as I am white and female, and so the rules are different. Sometimes I think perhaps it is only a mans dream..
It is difficult to accept that there is little value in being who I am (white and female), but I would like to have a happy life as well as live in Japan, and these discussions make me wonder if I should change my dream..?
Does anyone have any good (and real!) stories of Japanese male/western female relationships? Has a western man every lived in Japan and not married a Japanese girl?
just wondering..!!

[Jason]

Has a western man every lived in Japan and not married a Japanese girl?
just wondering..!!

You already know one. Peter!

[mumei]

thankyou ..that has cheered me up a little bit

[untmdsprt]

Does anyone have any good (and real!) stories of Japanese male/western female relationships?

I'll let you know how my drama pans out when the guy I went out with comes back in August.

Besides I have two Chinese friends that could be possibilities.

[Ulver_684]

this is something that worries me a little about trying to live in japan...
I have male friends who think that they can stay there by marrying a Japanese girl (and they are probably right) and also know Japanese girls that have married 'into' the UK as well...
I really want to live in Japan but every time I read these kind of discussions I think maybe I am just chasing a dream that is never going to be mine, as I am white and female, and so the rules are different. Sometimes I think perhaps it is only a mans dream..
It is difficult to accept that there is little value in being who I am (white and female), but I would like to have a happy life as well as live in Japan, and these discussions make me wonder if I should change my dream..?
Does anyone have any good (and real!) stories of Japanese male/western female relationships? Has a western man every lived in Japan and not married a Japanese girl?
just wondering..!!

Cheer up it's strange that you haven't find Japanese or Asian guy who wants to be your boyfriend! What country or place you live in

I don't want to presume you but I'm also a white Mexican/American female with alot of luck with both Asian and non-Asian people!

If you search Asian boyfriend, you'll find it so go for it now! Go out have fun, dress sexy, wear makeup, make sexy movies, touch your hair like your styling it out, etc and you will see immediatly results, I garantee it!

You will put an Asian guy nervous!

[mumei]

thankyou

[untmdsprt]

If you search Asian boyfriend, you'll find it so go for it now! Go out have fun, dress sexy, wear makeup, make sexy movies, touch your hair like your styling it out, etc and you will see immediatly results, I garantee it!

You will put an Asian guy nervous!

Umm, well dressed people always attract more people than ones wearing a T-shirt and jeans. A smile is always attractive too!!