Learn about talking about making/letting someone do something
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| INTRODUCTION |
| Naomi: ナオミです。 (Naomi desu.) |
| Peter: Peter here. Permission to Marry Your Daughter, #1. Naomi-sensei, this lesson was made based on a request by マクシワワ (makushiwawa), one of our listeners and one of the most active members on the message board. Now he wanted to know more about the causative ～（なになに）させる (~[nani nani] sa seru). In Japanese, it’s used in many ways. So sometimes it can be a bit difficult to understand. So today, we are going to take a look at that. Now Naomi-sensei, today’s conversation is between |
| Naomi: Three people 彼氏、彼女 and 彼女のお父さん (kareshi, kanojo and kanojo no o-tō-san) |
| Peter: So the boyfriend, the girlfriend, and the girlfriend’s father. |
| Naomi: Scary situation. |
| Peter: Scary situation. You are not a guy. You don’t understand how scary it is to meet the 彼女のお父さん、怖いですよ。 (Kanojo no o-tō-san, kowaidesu yo.) |
| Naomi: 怖い？ (Kowai) |
| Peter: 怖い。 (Kowai.) |
| Naomi: 本当？ (Hontō?) |
| Peter: 本当ですよ。 (Hontōdesu yo.) |
| Naomi: 怖かったですか？ (Kowakattadesu ka?) |
| Peter: まだ怖いです。 (Mada kowaidesu.) |
| Naomi: ああ、そう。 (Ā,-sō.) |
| Peter: I don’t know if it's something in our nature. Anyway, today is the first of the three-part series. Now what kind of Japanese we are going to be using today. We have the boyfriend, the girlfriend and the girlfriend’s father. |
| Naomi: 彼氏 (Kareshi) speaks polite Japanese to お父さん (o-tō-san) |
| Peter: Because he is in a lower position in regards to social status. |
| Naomi: 彼女 (Kanojo) speaks casual to her お父さん (o-tō-san) |
| Peter: And the daughter speaks casual Japanese to her father. So it’s going to be interesting to see the change in the politeness level. So pay attention to that. |
| Naomi: お父さん (o-tō-san) always speaks casual. |
| Peter: Because he is in a higher position. All right, this is the first of the three-part series using the causative and hopefully by the end of these three lessons, you have a much better grasp on how to use this. With that said, are you ready, Naomi-sensei? |
| Naomi: はい。 (Hai.) |
| Peter: Here we go. |
| DIALOGUE |
| 彼氏:お父さん、真由美さんと結婚させてください！！！ |
| Kareshi: O-tō-san, Mayumi-san to kekkon sasete kudasai!!! |
| お父さん:だめだ、だめだ！！ |
| O-tō-san: Dame da, dame da!! |
| 彼女:お父さん、お願い。私たちの結婚を許して。 |
| Kanojo: O-tō-san, onegai watashi-tachi no kekkon o yurushite. |
| お父さん:学生の身分で何を言っているんだ。 |
| O-tō-san: Gakusei no mibun de nani o itte iru n da. |
| 彼氏:お父さん、お願いします！！ |
| kareshi: O-tō-san, onegai shimasu!! |
| お父さん:お前に、「お父さん」なんて呼ばせんぞ！ |
| O-tō-san: Omae ni, "o-tō-san" nante yobasen zo! |
| もう一度お願いします。ゆっくりお願いします。 |
| (Mōichido onegaishimasu. Yukkuri onegaishimasu.) |
| 彼氏:お父さん、真由美さんと結婚させてください！！！ |
| Kareshi: O-tō-san, Mayumi-san to kekkon sasete kudasai!!! |
| お父さん:だめだ、だめだ！！ |
| O-tō-san: Dame da, dame da!! |
| 彼女:お父さん、お願い。私たちの結婚を許して。 |
| Kanojo: O-tō-san, onegai watashi-tachi no kekkon o yurushite. |
| お父さん:学生の身分で何を言っているんだ。 |
| O-tō-san: Gakusei no mibun de nani o itte iru n da. |
| 彼氏:お父さん、お願いします！！ |
| kareshi: O-tō-san, onegai shimasu!! |
| お父さん:お前に、「お父さん」なんて呼ばせんぞ！ |
| O-tō-san: Omae ni, "o-tō-san" nante yobasen zo! |
| 今度は英語が入ります。 |
| (Kondo wa eigo ga hairimasu.) |
| 彼氏:お父さん、真由美さんと結婚させてください！！！ |
| Kareshi: O-tō-san, Mayumi-san to kekkon sasete kudasai!!! |
| Boyfriend: Sir! Please allow me to get married to Mayumi! |
| お父さん:だめだ、だめだ！！ |
| O-tō-san: Dame da, dame da!! |
| Dad: No way! |
| 彼女:お父さん、お願い。私たちの結婚を許して。 |
| Kanojo: O-tō-san, onegai watashi-tachi no kekkon o yurushite. |
| Girlfriend: Dad, allow us to be together. |
| お父さん:学生の身分で何を言っているんだ。 |
| O-tō-san: Gakusei no mibun de nani o itte iru n da. |
| Dad: What the heck are you talking about? You guys are just students. |
| 彼氏:お父さん、お願いします！！ |
| kareshi: O-tō-san, onegai shimasu!! |
| Boyfriend: Dad, please! |
| お父さん:お前に、「お父さん」なんて呼ばせんぞ！ |
| O-tō-san: Omae ni, "o-tō-san" nante yobasen zo! |
| Dad: Hey, I don't want you to call me "dad." |
| POST CONVERSATION BANTER |
| Peter: Naomi-sensei どう思いましたか？ (Dō omoimashita ka?) |
| Naomi: Umm |
| Peter: What do you think? |
| Naomi: お父さん怖いですね。 (o-tō-san kowai desu ne.) He is quite upset 「お父さん」なんて呼ばせんぞ！ (o-tō-san' nante yoba sen zo!) |
| Peter: Yeah dad’s pretty angry. Don’t call me dad but 何となく (Nantonaku) For some reason お父さんの気持ち良くわかります。 (o-tō-san no kimochi yoku wakarimasu.) I can understand where the dad is coming from. |
| Naomi: ああ、そうですか。あの、質問があるんですけど。日本だと、彼女のお父さんのことは「お父さん」と呼びます。 (Ā, sō desu ka. Ano, shitsumon ga aru n desu kedo. Nihonda to, kanojo no o-tō-san no koto wa `o-tō-san' to yobimasu.) In Japan, boyfriend calls his girlfriend’s father as お父さん (o-tō-san). |
| Peter: Really? |
| Naomi: They don’t call his name. |
| Peter: They call him dad even though they are not engaged? |
| Naomi: No. |
| Peter: No way. In English, if you say “hey dad,” that means you are engaged or you are going to be part of the family. |
| Naomi: あ、そうですか？ (A,-sōdesu ka?) |
| Peter: Yeah. Otherwise you would say Mr. Kambe, Mr. Smith 図々しいですね (zuuzuushīdesu ne). |
| Naomi: そうですかね。お父さん、お母さんと呼びます。 (Sō desu ka ne. o-tō-san, o-kā-san to yobimasu.) |
| Peter: お父さん、ビール持ってきてください。 (o-tō-san, bīru motte kite kudasai.) “Hey dad, bring me another beer.” And do they call the mother お母さん (o-kā-san) |
| Naomi: はい。 (Hai.) |
| Peter: Just the boyfriend? |
| Naomi: うん、たぶん。 (Un, tabun.) |
| Peter: Eh… |
| Naomi: Or お父さま or お母さま (O-tō-sama or o-kā-sama). Did you mean お父様 (o-tō-sama) or お母様 (o-kā-sama), but yeah I think they call お父さん、お母さん (o-tō-san, o-kā-san) |
| Peter: どうでしょう？ ちょっと……。 (Dō deshou? Chotto…….) |
| Naomi: ええ？ そうかなあ。 (Ē? Sō ka nā.) |
| Peter: 間違ってるような気がするんですけど。 (Machigatteru yōna ki ga surun desu kedo.) Like I don’t know if you are right on this one Naomi-sensei. |
| Naomi: Definitely not their first name. |
| Peter: So wait, in your past, your boyfriends have called your parents dad and mom. |
| Naomi: I never invite my boyfriend to my home. |
| Peter: あら！ 複数……。 (Ara! Fukusū…….) |
| Naomi: Boyfriend to my house… |
| Peter: Okay I think Naomi-sensei just hit on a quite an important thing here. Umm, I think for older people, it was quite common not to bring home a boyfriend or girlfriend until you are going to be engaged. |
| Naomi: Umm depends on the family but yeah my family is very conservative. So if I bring someone home, they might think you are going to get married. |
| Peter: Hence the reason they would say mom, dad… |
| Naomi: そうですね。 (Sō desu ne.) |
| Peter: But from what I understand, like the younger generation, it’s quite common to introduce the boyfriend and girlfriend just casually. So if it’s a first date, I don’t think you’d show up お父さん、お母さん、今夜は何食べよう？ (o-tō-san, o-kā-san, kon'ya wa nani tabeyō?) “What are we going to eat tonight, dad or mom?” |
| Naomi: うん、そうですね。 (Un, sō desu ne.) |
| Peter: I think this is a really interesting cultural insight. I met quite a few Japanese people who’ve never introduced their boyfriend or girlfriends to the family until they decided to get married. Okay let’s take a look at the vocab. First we have |
| VOCAB LIST |
| Naomi: 彼女 (kanojo) |
| Peter: Girlfriend. |
| Naomi: か・の・じょ「彼女」 (ka no jo `kanojo') |
| Peter: This could also be used as just “girl”. “She” or “girlfriend.” |
| Naomi: And sometimes people pronounce like 彼女 (kanojo) for “girlfriend.” |
| Peter: Rising intonation. |
| Naomi: はい。 (Hai.) |
| Peter: 彼女 (kanojo) Sample sentence please. |
| Naomi: 彼女のお父さんと会う。 (Kanojo no o-tō-san to au.) |
| Peter: “I will meet my girlfriend’s father” 頑張ってください。 (Ganbatte kudasai.) Next |
| Naomi: 彼氏 (kareshi) |
| Peter: Boyfriend. |
| Naomi: か・れ・し「彼氏」 (ka re shi `kareshi') |
| Peter: And this doesn’t have the meaning of “boy,” right? |
| Naomi: Yeah… |
| Peter: That will be 彼 (kare) |
| Naomi: そうですね。 (Sō desu ne.) And some people, my father’s generation still use 彼氏 (kareshi) as “he”. |
| Peter: Really? |
| Naomi: But usually people use 彼 (kare). This one also will be pronounced as 彼氏 (kareshi). |
| Peter: Rising. |
| Naomi: はい。 (Hai.) |
| Peter: 彼氏 (kareshi) |
| Naomi: For “boyfriend” too. |
| Peter: Next we have |
| Naomi: 許す (yurusu) |
| Peter: To permit, to allow. |
| Naomi: ゆ・る・す「許す」 (Yuru su `yurusu') |
| Peter: Next. |
| Naomi: 身分 (mibun) |
| Peter: Social position, social status. |
| Naomi: み・ぶ・ん「身分」 (Mi bu n `mibun') |
| Peter: And finally |
| Naomi: 呼ぶ (yobu) |
| Peter: To call out. |
| Naomi: よ・ぶ「呼ぶ」 (yo bu `yobu') |
| Peter: Naomi-sensei, let’s take a closer look at some of the vocab words we talked about. First one I want to look at is 許す “to permit”, “to allow” but this can also mean “to forgive.” |
| Naomi: ああ、そうですね。「許してくださ－い」 (Ā, sō desu ne. `Yurushite kudasāi') “Please forgive me.” |
| Peter: Please forgive me. Now here but let’s take a look at what we had in the conversation. |
| Naomi: 結婚を許して (kekkon o yurushite) |
| Peter: Here it’s “allow.” |
| Naomi: So ‘something ～を許して’ (~ o yurushite’) |
| Peter: Would be “to allow, please allow, something, something.: In this case, marriage, we are opposed and on the other hand, we have just 許してください (yurushite kudasai) “please forgive me” and of course, another very polite way to apologize お許しください (o yurushi kudasai). |
| Naomi: Oh |
| Peter: Oh…お許しください……。 (Oyurushi kudasai…….) |
| Naomi: It’s a surprise to hear that word from you. |
| Peter: So yeah, it’s a very polite way to apologize. So 先生、宿題が終わってないです。許してください。 (Sensei, shukudai ga owattenai desu. Yurushite kudasai.) So I haven’t finished my homework. Please forgive me. Now let’s take a look at today’s grammar point. Naomi-sensei, what do we have? |
Lesson focus |
|---|
| Naomi: 今日の (Kyō no) grammar point は (wa) Causative construction. |
| Peter: Now this construction is used to express that someone or something causes the causative or allows someone or something to do something. Now this ‘make’ as opposed to ‘allow’ could be a tricky point for a lot of people. So we are going to take a closer look at that. Now the causative can be used for permission or coercive causative depending on the situation or context. Again, the situation and context determines the actual meaning of it. The construction is the same but whether it means “to allow” or “cause or make somebody” that’s determined by the situation. The construction is the same but the meaning can change. For example, let’s take a look at the conversation. Naomi-sensei, what do we have in the conversation? |
| Naomi: 結婚させてください。 (Kekkon sasete kudasai.) |
| Peter: Naomi-sensei, is this “allow” or “to make?” |
| Naomi: Allow. |
| Peter: And we can tell by the context お父さん (o-tō-san). So he is asking the father 真由美さんと結婚させてください。 (Mayumi-san to kekkon sasete kudasai.) |
| Naomi: 僕と真由美さんを結婚させてください。 (Boku to Mayumi-san o kekkon sasete kudasai.) |
| Peter: “Please allow me to marry Mayumi!” Let’s take a look at the particles here. |
| Naomi: お父さん、僕を真由美さんと結婚させてください。 (o-tō-san, boku o Mayumi-san to kekkon sasete kudasai.) |
| Peter: So let’s just break this down. First we have |
| Naomi: お父さん (o-tō-san) |
| Peter: Father. |
| Naomi: 僕を (boku o) |
| Peter: 僕 (boku), a way for a male to refer to himself followed by the object marker を (o). |
| Naomi: 真由美さん (Mayumi-san) |
| Peter: Mayumi |
| Naomi: と (to) |
| Peter: With |
| Naomi: 結婚 (kekkon) |
| Peter: Marriage |
| Naomi: させて (sa sete) |
| Peter: Make |
| Naomi: ください (kudasai) |
| Peter: “Please.” Now this “make” is “allow.” So “please make, please allow me to.” “Please allow me to marry with Mayumi” but notice here, the object is を (o). So he is asking the dad to make him, which is a way to ask permission. Please dad, make me and in doing – in the form of this construction, we translate it as “please allow me, please make me marry with your daughter” but of course it’s translated as “please allow me to.” In today’s PDF, there is a very detailed write-up on the difference of usage in the causative, just the plain causative as opposed to asking permission or allowing. It has the comparison between the particles used for the straight causative to make somebody do something and to use the causative to ask permission or to get permission. Now before we leave, let’s take a look at the second use of the causative, the last line of the conversation. |
| Naomi: お前に「お父さん」なんて呼ばせんぞ。 (Omae ni `o-tō-san' nante yoba sen zo.) |
| Peter: Here too we have permission, allow using the causative to form a sentence in which permission is in this case not granted. Let’s take a closer look at the sentence, okay. First we have |
| Naomi: おまえに (Omae ni) |
| Peter: You, particle に (ni) here. So his direction, you. |
| Naomi: 「お父さん」なんて (`o-tō-san' nante) |
| Peter: “Father” and なんて (nante) is adding emphasis. |
| Naomi: 呼ばせん (yoba sen) |
| Peter: Which is the contracted form of |
| Naomi: 呼ばせない (yoba senai) |
| Peter: Now, this means “won’t let you call, won’t let you call.” So we have “you father won’t let you call.” So “you are not calling me dad.” First, take a look at how we got this construction 呼ばせない (yoba senai). That starts with, what word do we start with here? |
| Naomi: 呼ぶ (yobu) |
| Peter: Then we form the causative which is |
| Naomi: 呼ばせる (yoba seru) |
| Peter: Which can mean either “to make someone call” or “to allow someone to call,” again depending on the context. Here we have the negative form which is |
| Naomi: 呼ばせない (yoba senai) |
| Peter: “To make someone not call” or “to allow someone not to call.” Now in this case, it’s a permission. We are talking about permission. He is not allowing - he won’t let the son call him dad. Literally but again it’s the same construction as he won’t make the son call him dad and this has to do with the particles. What particle do we have here following the son who is referred to in a very kind of informal, almost a rude way おまえ (omae) |
| Naomi: に (ni) |
| Peter: Here, this is direction おまえにお父さん (omae ni o-tō-san) What would follow this if we had particles? |
| Naomi: と (to) |
| Peter: Followed by |
| Naomi: 呼ばせない (yoba senai) |
| Peter: So “I won’t allow you to call me father.” |
| Naomi: お前に「お父さん」と呼ばせない (Omae ni `o-tō-san' to yoba senai) |
Outro |
| Peter: “I am not going to let you call me dad. Don’t call me dad. You don’t have that permission.” Now inside the PDF, there will be a really detailed write-up of what we covered today. You definitely want to pick up the PDF to understand how the causative can be used to grant permission. That’s going to do for today. |
| Naomi: じゃあ、また！ (Jā, mata!) |
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