Japanese people marry whit foreigns?

[sodapple]

Well, I'm from Mexico city, in my doubt is: Is it possible some girl from japan could want marry me? of course I know they need to know me first. but in this aspect how is the japanese culture?

mata ne!!

[Jason]

It's certainly possible. The how of getting her to marry you is up to you though.

[Fedgrub]

It's certainly possible. The how of getting her to marry you is up to you though.

hahaha definately. From what I understand there is no particular common views against it within society or closer social contacts.

[sodapple]

that really leave me a hard task.
so, impossible because I think I will not go to japan...
any cute japanese girl wants to come here?

またね！がんばれえ！

モ－セ

[Fedgrub]

:roll: that really leave me a hard task.
so, impossible because I think I will not go to japan...
any cute japanese girl wants to come here?

またね！がんばれえ！

モ－セ

HAHAHA

What the hell? Because we can't guarantee they will marry you? HAHAHA

[hatch_jp]

Many Japanese girls want to get married with a foreign guys.

This is one of a dating site for Japanese hoping to get to know a foreigner and foreigners hoping to get to know Japanese.
http://www.japancupid.com/



Anyway... I wonder why only a few Caucasian girls want to get to know a Japanese guy whereas many Caucasian boys want to know a Japanese girl....

[Javizy]

Isn't it discrimination to make your bride Japanese before you've met her? What if you meet a nice girl in Mexico City? It might be a good idea to get through a dinner or maybe a movie before you start ordering the wedding cake

[Psy]

Anyway... I wonder why only a few Caucasian girls want to get to know a Japanese guy whereas many Caucasian boys want to know a Japanese girl....

Simple answer: Culture. Western and Eastern girls alike look at strength, confidence, and equality... let's face it, a disturbing number of Japanese guys these days don't seem to live up to those standards. Western guys do. This isn't to say there aren't execeptions-- I have encountered couples who are Japanese-man-western-woman, but indeed they are quite a bit rarer. There are much more developed (and accurate) explanations into this social phenomenon, but from my observation that is the long and short of it.

And Javizy, like it or not, I'd argue that the entire dating game is based on discrimination. Granted though, I'm with you in that I'd at least like to meet someone before I start planning our wedding.

[Taurus]

One of my chums reckons that a lot of Japanese girls like the idea of dating western men because they're under the impression that western men are easier to keep under the thumb. I would disagree with him, only my (Japanese) girlfriend probably won't let me.

[jimmykimble]

@sodapple: i think going for someone just because of their race is quite shallow. please show some respect towards Japanese women and women of all nationalities.

@Taurus: i think those girls are liars and very low-class.. trying to cover up their own shallowness by putting down and spreading lies about the men in their own race. there are a lot of good Japanese women out there, but these aren't them.

@Psy: your observation is flawed. believing in such things shows how simple-minded you are. and it is quite condescending. this is of course just my observation.

@rascism

[Kare]

@jimmykimble:
as much as I appreciate your concern about rasistic comments, you are unfortunalely slightly missing the point.
It's statistically proven that most Western women have a hard time getting an Japanese boyfriend, while Western guys obviously don't have such a problem.
It's a valid observation and it's okay to ask why.
I don't like to see this as racism, but as a way of discussing culture.
I don't think that Japanese women want to have a western boyfriend because "he is 'easier' to controll" but rather because he will allow them way more freedom then they will be able to find in a "classic" or more accurately "conservative" Japanese realtionship.
That is one of the reasons why many Japanese Male-Western Female Relationships break sooner or later. Even if he did get up the courage to ask her out or she was just shamelessly hiting on him till he gave in, she sooner or later reaches a point, where she feels that she just can't fit in. To many rules and restriction that are simply beyond her and she refuses to accomodate to. Or do I have to remind you on the hugh cultural gap between Japan, or Asia for that matter, and pretty much all the rest of the world?
Beside the fact that it's appearantly "cool" and highly squeel worthy for Japanese girls or womans to get a non-Japanese boyfriend. And I have been told repeatedly that they really trying when it comes to that. Nothing about shy or holding back. Just play "Cinderally lost her brain and can't fix ABC" and wait for the well mannered Western Guys to jump to your rescue.... Which by the way is a way of flirting almost all around the world and wouldn't be if it doesn't work. Which isn't to say that these relationships aren't problematic either, because the women might get more freedom then they bargained for and now have to figure how to get 'well mannered' Western Guy to stop stomping on some of the most basic cultural rules she lives by.
Japanese males aren't like that. No guy is going to pretend he can't fix something so a woman (!) jumps to his rescue. Plus: they know about the different cultural perspectives. And I wager it simply irritates the hell out of them...

And:
I highly recommand googling up some relationship experiences between Westeners and Japanese. Aspecially from the Girls perspective. Or flirting techniques... most of them are so subtle, most people from outside of Asia are rather unlikely to notice them. Therefore it's actually amazing if you get something like that to work with a foreigner.
And something I read recently: if a Japanese person offers you to use their shower - which is likely to offend or irritate the hell out of most westerners - that person is not only hitting on you, but actually asking for sex. I for once would wonder if I smell, but it's part of their culture, going along with the "preperation of hearts" and with the fact that when ever I read a description about the genderroles during sex, I actually get a headache.

In a way it's a form of advanced racism, not putting these things down to their race but to their culture...

[jimmykimble]

thanks for the recommendation but i dont think ill be googling such thing as im really not interested in learning how to flirt with foreign women or how to spot signs that they want sex. im actually here for the language and furthering my career.

[Kare]

I'm also here for the language, actually because there is the chance that my other half will want to move to Japan one day and I will have to decide whether or not I will want to move along.
So under the prospect of a potential stay there I feel like I want to know how their culture works. And I didn't suggest to learn Japanese in order to get into a relationship, but more to look at their costumes to understand how many differences there are between our concepts and theirs. If you want to use Japanese to further your career cultural knowlede is going to become important the second you want to use your Japanesen. And the more formalized a certain situation is, the more you can see how a certain culture influences people. Of cause you can also get that from observing a business man, but I dare to doubt that he will tell you everytime you violated some of the costumes that seem as an integral part of himself and his society to him...

[jimmykimble]

its customs. and i get plenty of that the right way from jpod101's Survival Phrases, Culture Class et cetera, thank you. but to answer the topic starter, Japanese women are just like everyone else and will date and marry whoever they fall for. really, just be yourself. theres no need to take up Kare's Culture Class #1: Western Male - Japanese Women gender roles. but i still dont think you have to look across the globe to find a meaningful relationship. if you can like someone for who she is, im sure you wont be disappointed.

[Javizy]

I think I must have missed the survival phrases on interracial sex-fuelled relationships. Jimmy has just spewed out a bunch of ideals, while ignoring the obvious reality that there are far more Western-male-Japanese-woman couples than the other way around; you even have testimony from a Japanese guy himself in this very thread.

Does this imbalance mean that Western women and everyone capable of making this observation are Hitler-saluting, lynch-mobbing super-Nazis, or is it an indication of the way two seemingly different worlds perceive each other, which could have made an interesting discussion without certain condescending buzzkillingtons?